Thank-You

Thank you so much for reading my journal, and being so kind to me.  It really does matter to have people actually care about you under these circumstances.  And for me, it is a pleasure to share ny life with you.  As Sharon Osbourne always says, "my life is an opened book.  We hold no secrets."....And I have to add..."I am what I am, and that is just what it is, like it or not!"....I would especially like to thank the following, for their comments, e-mails, and even IM's....Gretchen, thank you over and over for your kind words...and yes, I have been reading Edgar Cayce...I had bought 6 books of his in the past, and now I am re-reading them again!....Bill and Libby, my NJ/LAS VEGAS friends......SDROGERSON in Scotland, I'm so happy about your comment...that the entry was inspirational. You are a very learned , and well-read man,  and a comment like that just was too much for me!...Susan, aka...Dakota Rose...you are a true friend!  Dawn...you are really one of my favorite people, and I feel your strength behind me....and Dalwestern...thank you so much, and I love the pix of your horses!

Well, I just got finished talking to Jimmy a few minutes ago..our last call before bedtime....We are so excited, and Jimmy sounds so happy on the phone.  It is like a big weight has been lifted from our shoulders!...We discussed how in going to the rehab center, he is in fact getting out of the prison system, per say.  The place he is going to is just that...a rehab place, mainly for drug addicts and alcoholics.  There will be people there that have not come from prison, but are there for rehabilatation.  I looked it up, and the place has plenty of programs geared for family, etc...lots of recovering groups, and social events...lots of support groups.  Well, Jimmy is not addicted in any such way, but this is a stepping stone for him.  He feels he will get through there fast...after 35 days, as they are not looking for rehabilation from drugs/alcohol from him.  Once there, he will not be called an inmate or prisoner anymore.  In reality, I will no longer be a "prisoner's wife."  He will wear his own clothes.  He can have his razor, wristwatch.  He will no longer wear his "STATE NUMBER" on his clothes.  Right now, Jimmy is a number!..When I write to him, I must put his numbers on the envelope.  ..........So that is the exciting part for us....he will no longer be considered an inmate!......He thinks he may get out of there after the holiday.  They transport them on Thursdays, and he'll be notified the previous Monday or Tuesday.

So I've been busy here getting his stuff together!  He sent me a list of things to go with him to the rehab center.  Next week, I'll go shopping for a long list of toiletries, eg toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, soap, deodorant, after- shave lotion.   He also needs 2 towels.  I will go buy him sneakers...size 10 1/2 eee  (my gosh!  I'm only 6 1/2 b).  He has given me a list of his clothes...pants and shirts.. We will have phone cards to use.  After about 8 days, I should be able to go see him.  In fact, this place encourages family visits, as family is the most important thing in a persons rehabilatation process.....So that's about it!  I have his list on the table here, along with a small tote bag, which I started filling up with the items he requested!...........Hope life is treating everyone well!  Good-nite and sweet dreams!................Fran

"MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT PRISON LIFE"

When you have a moment, please read, "MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT PRISON LIFE."  (just type in those words in the bar, and press go.  it will bring you to the web-site).  It is quite a long article.  The person writing the article explains the whole situation about our prison system better than me.  Please read the section on prison phone calls, unhealthy food, and visits to the prison..(note about having to go to the bathroom while at the prison...this was a real problem for me when I visited Jimmy)..how terrible and de-humanizing these visits  are.  I have not even been allowed to see my husband since August 15, 2003...that is over 10 months ago.  I ask you to read it, so you will not think I am alone with my thoughts...so you will not think I'm crazy...but that a whole big world of prisoners loved ones go through what I do, everyday.  For Jimmy and I , it will end soon.  He will happily go to the rehab center soon.  However, I just can't forget this experience.  I cannot put it behind me that easily. My fellow inmate- loved ones, will still be suffering, as I go on with life.  They will still be part of the "SYSTEM."  ...The system that is suppossed to rehabilatate the inmate, and not kill him.  And not make the loved one go crazy, and lose his sense of balance in life.  ....Read the article , and see what I mean.  You may be shocked at what you read, if you are not aware of the prison system.  For those of us exposed to it, we are used to it.........I still have nightmares of my visits to the prison....of the disgusting place it is and how we are treated.  And how we must hang our head low, and look at the ground, as if we are the criminal...nothing we say or do is right...we are helpless.

Well, let me apologize for my craziness the other day.  And thank- you all for your comments, and advice.  It really meant alot for me to show how you cared for me.  After I wrote on the computer in my journal, which was my life-saver, I flung myself in bed, as I usually do, when very depressed.  I slept till the next day.  In my sleep, I knew I would find the answer to my problem.  The next day, at 1pm,(wed.), I decided to call at&t, and simply say, "I want to make a payment. "  There was no problem, as the previous day with "the supervisor," who insisted I pay the whole thing before they turned it back on.  So, on this day, everyone was pleasant to me...they were happy to receive  $4oo more...a total of $800 this month, with a promise of $150 next week.  I was told the phone would be turned back on in 24 to 72 hours.  So today, at 1pm I got Jimmy's call,24 hours later,  and everything is back in balance now.  He said he walked around in a daze when the phone was blocked.  His first words were, "I knew you would do it again, Fran!...My wife never fails!"

Thank you for your advice.  I'll answer some things here to make things clear.  Dawn, I can't e-mail Jimmy.  There are no computers (ON-LINE) in the prison.  Yes, I wrote him a letter as soon as phone was blocked, as he did to me.  We do that everytime the phone inadvertantly gets blocked.  We have boxfuls of love-letters, etc.  I plan to get them all together and publish it in a book one of these days...our letters to each other.  Mail usually gets there in a few days, but once in a while, it takes weeks.  All my mail is opened and examined, and I suppose read , by the officials.  They see all the pix I send...nothing is private.  Every once in a while they remove something.  For example , I sent him directions and a map to the place he is going...well, no maps allowed, and they took it.  No stickers are allowed, either, because it might contain drugs.  Everything is very strict and very odd..Dawn, thank you so much for caring about me.  I look up to you as a mentor.  You have been married a long time, and have a wonderful marriage.  I will take all your suggestions in maintaining a good, strong, marriage.  Right now, that is the most important thing for me.  To be like an anchor in this marriage.  I keep praying for "peace, balance,  and tranquility," in our home.  (I keep saying those 3 words to myself)...........And Gretchen, thank you so much for your thoughts, prayers, and friendship, today as always.  At&t is the only phone company to have a discount plan for "correctional institutions."  That is why I went with them, otherwise my bills would even be higher!...I have to have Verizon for local in this part of Jersey, and I have a Sprint cell phone.  So, as you can see, I pay 3 phone bills...aT&t, Verizon and Sprint.  The good part is, as soon as Jimmy leaves the prison, I will cancel at&t....we can use calling cards where he is going....so the problem will soon be solved.  About your other advice...a payment plan...at&t called me a couple of weeks ago to thank me for being a good customer.  He told me they will never shut my phone off, as long as I pay $400 on the first of the month.  Now, here comes this other woman who said something else...see what I'm saying?  No continuity in what their people say...it could drive one insane!..........................Well, it's all over now.

A little good news!  I got another " letter- to - the editor" published in the local newspaper....THE OCEAN COUNTY OBSERVER.....It is a tribute to "NANCY AND RONNIE," which I wrote while watching the funeral.  The paper called me and said it was going on the editor's desk, so it should be printed in a couple of weeks.  Maybe I'll type it out here, for everyone to read.  I am really thrilled to get it published, as I'm trying to build a portofolio of my published writing...........Well, good-night everyone, and thanks again, for putting up with "crazy old Fran!"

 

at&t

Well, once again, happiness doesn' seem to last very long, when something steps in to poisen your life, and just want to slash your wrists, for real this time.  And I came right to my computer, to talk it out to you all....all of you, especially loved ones of prisoners, who, I personally know, have been through this time and time again.  As I sit here crying and typing, full of hatred  for this world..........I don't care...the world always does it to me...........and I hide my feelings from those who know me...........so they never know who I really am........but. I'll tell you what happened...I hope in a few hours, it will all pass, and I'll be back on the road to happiness again.  But i doubt it, because they picked the wrong time to do this to me......This is what happened, to make me so upset, and almost suicidal at this point......I don't care what you think of me...I just can't solve all the problems anymore, alone................1 1/2 hours ago, at 12 noon, at&t leaves a recorded message on my phone...they are putting a block on my prison calls, until I pay $645.  Now, this happens every month to me, but it is the at&t office that  calls, and last month they called me and thanked me, saying I was one of their best customers, because usually my bills are over $1000, and always paid.  Last month the person vowed to me they would not shut the phone off as long as I paid a minimum of $400 a month....Now the point is, EVERY MONTH I TALK TO SOMEONE DIFFERENT, AND EVERY MONTH THEY TELL ME SOMETHING DIFFERENT........So. now today, they refused to turn it back on.........so that means I have no communication with Jimmy.  He is suppossed to call me to let me know when he is leaving, to get his clothes there, and exactly what to do........and on top of it all, July 1st is my birthday..........oh it is a cruel, cruel, world........I just can't deny that.....Actually, I know it's a beautiful world....but I just can't get ahold of myself right now........I have to go to bed and cry right now.........I'm sorry, my moods are so sporadic.........

Soon to leave prison

We're  so happy!  Jimmy got the offiicial letter that he'll be leaving prison soon....most likely in the next 2 weeks!  He will go to a rehab place for a month or so.  I will be able to see him there...for long visits.  He will be wearing his own clothes...no more orange or khaki prison garb. He will have his own wristwatch and not the plastic one he wears in prison.  He will have his own razor.  It will be air-conditioned.  The prison he is in is not air-conditioned and is hot as anything...personally to me that is inhumane to have hundreds of sweaty men in a prison, hot and humid...I just don't know how they all do it..........We've been talking on the phone, walking on air.  After all , we haven't seen each other since last August...that's 11 months ago....a long time...............Well, I'll cut this short tonite.  I have poisen ivy on both legs.  I think I caught it from my dog, Prince.  They say you can catch it from a dog 's fur, but the dog doesn't have rash. I walk him in a field, and I thought I saw poisen ivy.  They also say it can be caught airborn....so, if you think it's there, don't go anywhere near the place.  They also say to wash the skin, which I do with my shower spray often....The blisters are dryining out, but the legs are still itchy........so I'm applying calamine lotion, and taking benedryl.............so that's why I'm a litle tired!.....So good-nite and sweet dreams!...............Fran

Thunderstorms ....

I left the last entry ...hanging...because a thunderstorm came suddenly, and I'm scared of thunder and lightening.  As a child, of 10 or younger, my mother would gather me and my 2 sisters in the living room, on the floor near her, as she sat in her rocking chair.  She would hold her rosary beads and say the rosary.  She would also say an Italian prayer, in Italian, that translates, "dear God, please make the bolts of lightening go higher and higher in the sky, away from us, and protect us.".....So it's no wonder that I'm afraid of thunderstorms, because my mother taught me to fear them at an early age.  My first thunderstorm with Jimmy was July 4, 2001, in Mount Charleston, Nevada.  We had gone there for a couple of days for my birthday and we were on the 3rd floor, high in the mountains....close to the sky and clouds....closer than I've ever been to a thunderstorm.  Flashes of lightening filled the room!....The rain poured down in a fury.  Jimmy, knowing I was afraid, pulled me down on the bed with him.  He sat up in the bed, with me in front of him, sitting between his legs, my back to him.  He locked his arms around me.....very, very tight....my husband is a very strong man...the strength of his arms is unimaginable.  He held me so tight against him, I can still remember his strength and how I couldn't move at all.  He whispered in my ear, as the thunderstorm raged..."Fran, now we will be struck together if lightening strikes us...we are one."  And so my fear subsided.  I relaxed my body.  I knew he was right.  Finally it ended....And it was a very close storm!..................................................................Well, tonite we talked on the phone about what food I hould brinmg him in the evaluation center.  Of course he said he only wanted me, but that's beside the point!.........We're Italian, and we like to eat a lot!.....I decided on pizza....Jimmy's favorite...2 pizza's with pepperoni!........and a dish of spaghetti and meatballs and sausage from the restaurant.....an Italian sub from WAWA....a roasted chicken with cole slow and potato salad...."What do you want for dessert?" I asked.   "You," he said.  Well unfortunately there's no sex at the evaluatation center........."Fran," he said, "that's too much food"......"Well, you can share it with the other guys," I said.  Anyhow, Jimmy did agree on pizza and the Italian sub.  Truthfully, we could care less about food.  But it is stuff to think about, as we bide our time to seeing one another.  He saw the captain today, and Jimmy is next in line to go.  We think it should be within the next 2 weeks.  I have occupied my mind with cleaning and de-cluttering our house....it is better than sitting ad waiting....so I've become almost fanatical, cleaning and re-arranging from morn till night.  Closets, kitchen cabinets....here I come!..........Jimmy will stay at the evaluation center for a minimum of 35 days.  There are oaths, etc. that he must memorize before they will release him.  Of course, you know my husband....he has everything memorized already.....So at the evaluation center, I can visit him and touch him and kiss him, and bring food.  After the 35 days, he will go to the half-way house.  Jimmy thinks he will be eligible for week-end furloughs almost immediatly...in a few weeks...so he will come home on Friday's and go back on Sunday 's.  He will work and have a regular job.....And that is how our life will be, until October, when he is up for parole.  WHEW!........what a process this whole thing is!...I never in my wildest dreams ever could imagine that I'd be part of the prison system..........it's almost like a dream.........but it's better for me now....it is reality for me now....and it's really not that horrible, if you keep your head and your senses about you.  It is "just a process," you have to go through............My Jimmy, I am your wife, your partner, your soulmate, your woman....and I stand by your side in all things.  From the beginning of our marriage, I told Jimmy, "I am happy just to be your wife...just to be Mrs....  that;s all I want....to be by your side..............................Fran

Life goes on

Life goes on as usual at the prison!  Bolonga sandwiches for sunday dinner.  2 donuts and 2 pieces of toast for breakfast!  Very healthy I must say!....and in the evening, the inmates eat snack after snack, that they buy from the commissery..........the smell of popcorn permeates the air in the evening....burnt popcorn, that is!...Jimmy likes what the inmates call, 'crack soup."  That is, Ramon Noodle soup....I bought myself 10 today...they are cheap, so the inmates can afford them, and they are fullfilling.  I bought 10 / .99 today.  I never knew they use that slang term for them....as I understand 'crackheads" like to eat them...well, live and learn!  Every Saturday afternoon, all the inmates change their bedsheets at the same time....very interesting.  Yesterday, Sunday, Jimmy helped to pass out supplies to the inmates...like cleaning supplies.  No bleach is allowed for inmates.  Jimmy loves to do things and help out.  He is a model student!  Count is done many, many times a day, and can you imagine

Nancy and Ronnie

At this moment, Nancy is flying with President Regan's body back to the beautiful west coast...the home he loved...California, ...to have a burial as the sun sets over the Pacific ocean.  Today is a bright, sunny , warm day in California , and here on the east coast it is a rainy, cool, moist day...actually, it is a good day for a funeral...a day that just makes you want to cry.  As I watched the pitter patter of the raindrops fall on the rooftops of cars, on t.v., it reminded me of the teardrops of our nation, as we mourn for President Regan and his family.  Watching the funeral on t.v. was quite an experience, as I joined our nation.  To listen to the wonderful speeches, and yes, I listened to their every word....Margaret Thatcher, President Bush, and the former President Bush.  But for me, Nancy, along with her husband, Ronnie, was the hero.  She strongly stood by her man in life, ....in sickness, in great times, in sad times, and yes, in death she was there,,,and now beyond death into eternity........Their's was a true "Love Story."....She is the hero.  She "loved her man,"...and still does..........can we really say that about many marriages in our society?......I doubt it.  In a country where our divorce rate is 50%......what has happened to love and devotion in our country?..........So, I'd like to say, she is my mentor....the woman I look up to.  "STAND BY YOUR MAN.".......Need I say more?  If you love your man, stand by him at all times...love with-holds all things....the good, the bad, the ugly..........And yes, to me, Nancy is an icon.  Throughout the funeral, she shed not a tear.  Her face sturdy, but weakened as the day progressed...she did it all for Ronnie.  He was by her every step of the way...and she knew it......Their's was a "fairy-tale life."......From the glamor of Hollywood and stardom, to the dignity of being President and First-Lady, they had it all!........But most of all, they had a tremendous love for each other, and devotion.  Let us learn a lesson from them.  It is ok to "love' and "be loved.".................So, together, my prison wives and loved ones, we continue to love our man.......And so be it.

Thank you!

Thank you everyone , for your good thoughts and well wishes!...Everything went great today!  Jimmy saw the psychiatrist, and was done in about 2 minutes, flat!  The psychiatrist said he is ready to leave the prison, and go to the half-way house evaluation center!  We are so happy and thrilled!  Jimmy and I have been floating on air all day!  Jimmy says he can just feel me in his arms!  And of course I feel the same!  Not a moment goes by, that I don't think of Jimmy, since he has been gone the past 15 months.  He is part of my body and soul.  In my mind I make love to him all day.  He walks with me, sleeps with me, touches me, kisses me........I play romantic love songs all day.  I know every word of those songs by heart!...I dance in front of him, pretending he is here.  Being in love is a wonderful feeling!...endomorphones are rushing through our body constantly!  I suggest everyone "fall in love!"  Statistically, the feeling of elation of being in love only lasts about 6 months at the most. Physically, they say, the feeling of being in love , cannot physically last very long.  It is hard for the human body to concentrate and be productive when in love.  Well, we've proven the statistics wrong!  It is 3 years and 3 months, and we are still ectastically in love!....even though apart, we did it!  it is usually teenagers that feel this kind of love...called infatuation....well, guys, we still have it...at 49 and 51 years old!...............................Well, more good news today!  I got another, YES ANOTHER, story published.  I got the contract in the mail, today!  It is called  "Here Comes the Bride."  Of course it is the story of "Yours Truely!".......jimmy and I...our wedding in Las VEGAS...........It will be published in the Sept. issue of "True LOVE MAGAZINE"....And, on top of it all, I even get paid for it!....I just can't believe I'm getting so many things published....and it is really so easy for me!....(well anyone can do it, if they take the time, and persist)..................Just one more thing, I will not be driving alone to the half-way house.  I cannot handle new and unknown places to drive to.  So A senior citizen family friend will be driving me....I have him all psyched up about going there to see Jimmy.  This friend drives me to doctors appointments, etc. and helps out around the house....for example, he put screen doors up, bought food for me in the snow, and would stop by to get the mail in the snow.  So, please don't worry...I won't be driving!.................Take care everyone!........Hope you have a nice evening, and thank you for reading my journal!......All comments are welcome.  Come on, prison wives, share your thoughts with me!.............FRAN, A PRISONER'S WIFE

'Excitement!"

The day has finally arrived!  We are so excited!  Jummy has an appointment too se the psychiatrist for evaluation at 1:30 pm today.  I can't believe it's finally here!  Also, there are 40 other inmates who are happy, as they will also see the psychiatrist.  This means that Jimmy will probably be moved to an "evaluation center" in Trenton.  He shoukd go there in around 2 weeks. Once there, I can go see him and bring his clothes with me.  I've been dreaming and thinking about it all night!..I will be able to hold him and hug and kiss him.  He shoukd stay there 35 days, and then will be moved into a half-way house.  Once in the half-way house, he will have weekend furloughs home.  Things should start moving fast, as he should have been there 5 months ago.  But one never jniws with the "systen," since the prison system in our country is now very backed up....and they incarcerate just about everyone for anything!......Sorry if I made lots of mistakes today.  My vision is very blurry today, and I can barely see the screen.  However, I did go see the retina specialist, my eye doctor , a couple of days ago, and the good news is that my eyes haven't gotten any worse!....And he has yet to take away my driver's license, as there are different levels of blindness, and I'm still in the lower levels.  Actually, my left eye seems stronger.  The doctor seems to think it is due to my reading so much, despite everything.  ...................Well talk to you later, and I'll keep you posted about what's happening.

Busy Day

It was a busy day for me today at home, but it was just "another" day at the prison.  The psychiatrist never showed up to evealuate the 40 prisoners, so they can be sent to the half-way house.  Tomorrow, Jimmy and the 40 inmates will go to visit the man in charge of this...The Captain.  I guess he'll have a few angry men on his hands!  The inmates are getting restless!  As for me, it was a busy day.  My senior citizen friend took me to the eye docotor.  The good news is that my eyes haven't gotten any worse...they are the same. However I still can't see the big E on the eye chart...if that's telling you anything!  Then, my friend came over and did a few odd-jobs around the house.  Then I had to call AAA TO jump start my other car (not the jag), the white Saturn, which has sat there just about all winter.  We keep that car for Prince, our dog!..Tomorrow I'll take Prince out for a ride around our neighborhood. Prince just loves riding in the car!...his ears flapping...he's all excited....I just love my little doggie!  If you all have a chance, please read the comments by "she she spice."  You'd better read them today, because I'll be blocking her tomorrow.  That's the only way to handle these type of people.  There are a lot of angry and unhappy people in this world, and she is one of them.  And I really don't care, only I feel sorry that these kind of angry people exist on our planet.  That is why we have wars, etc.....a tremendous amount of anger...and these people lash out at others.  She is upset about my journal, because something in her life makes her angry.  I just don't know.  I write this journal for the benefit of others... To show loved ones of inmates they are not alone.  I also do it as a therapy for myself.  And I enjoy sharing my interesting life with others.  Just tonite, Jimmy spoke on the phone with me , saying we have interesting lives.  And it's true.  I haven't even shared 1/4 of our interesting life with you!.....everybody likes a bit of sensationalism!....that is what books and movies are based on!  You have no idea if what I write is fact or fiction.  I may have made the whole journal up!  You'll never know!  but for the sake of my fellow inmate-loved ones, they know it's all true...they can identify with what I write.  And most can identify with SHE SHE SPICE.  That is why prison wives and loved ones live for the most part in hiding...they are scared...they are afraid of the angry people like SHE SHE SPICE..........but I'm not afraid.  Come on, you prison wives...or prison husbands.....leave a comment...help support me, as we support each other....let us be strong against the angry people in the world,  Truthfully, I have met many wonderful people through my journal.  They are very supportive, and have become my friends!....One last thought. I loved being in the work force for 28 years. I loved helping people. But every now and then you came upon a person like SHE SHE SPICE...........out to "get everybody...out to make everyone miserable, as they are miserable."  I am so glad that I retired at the age of 48....I now stay home and do frre-lance stuff....and I don't have to deal with those miserable people anymore............Now, all I have to do is "BLOCK THEIR NAME."............ha, ha........the joke's on you!...................

More Thoughts

Dear Jimmy,

To the man I love.  To the best man in the world.  Let me send my good thoughts about you into the universe, and beyond this universe. You have made me a total woman. You have given me strength to carry on in this sometimes cruel world.  You have taught me about love, romance, strength, endurance.  Between us , we have a magnificent flow of energy.  It is magnetic.  We heal one another.  Although 80 miles apart, we are one with each other.  Before you went to prison, we agreed that this would be the one opportunity to play "mind games" with one another.  What I mean is psychic experiences with one another.  And yes, it has been working with us....and we don't even try, it just comes naturally to us.  For example, for the past 2 weeks, I had taken out my folder on Art Bell's old newsletters that I've kept for years.  And on the phone the other day, you told me you met an inmate that also loves Art Bell. You were talking to him about his radio show, "Coast to Coast."  You were discussing subjects on his show.  See what I mean?  Is this coincidence.  And when you call me because you think I need you at that moment...and you find me crying..........The other day, you said, "Fran, it is almost 1 1/2 years I've been incarcerated, and everyday, you still tell me that you live every moment for me. That is incredible. You are an incredible woman."  Well, yes, I do live for Jimmy.  My role at this moment is to keep our household together.  And I do. You see, before I met Jimmy, I did lots of things in my life.....But I've never been connected to a man like I am with Jimmy, my husband.  I traveled round the world, many, many times...and it was for pleasure.  I took 2 international trips/year.  I've been to 28 countries, some 2 or 3 times.  Italy, France, England, I went to 3 times.  I've been to India, Morroco, Scandinavian countries, Greece, Scotland...to name a few.  I went on cruises in Greece and Italy and the Carribean.  I've been to 8 islands in the carribean, Hawaii, and Mexico.  You see, I've seen and done it all........more than the average person. People would die just to go on one international vacation.  I was blessed, but I did work hard for it..........and now, all that is a memory.  I don't want o go anywhere...just to lay in my husband's arms..that is all I want.  I've had some people leave cruel comments.  They say, "get a life."  I always had a life, and I still do.  Actually, I am excited about this part of our life.  It will lead us to great places in life.  Life is a journey.  It ultimatly is what you make of it.  My advice is, don't be jealous of others....of what others have and do.  We all have the power within us to climb to the highest star.  I do, and you do , too!.........................with love,  Fran

Day By Day

Well, day by day goes by...that is all it really is for me.  We are now into spring, and going into summer soon.......June is here.  I 'm glad it's this June, and not last June.  I fill my days by being "busy."  Doing things to make the day go by.  I'm probably the busyiest person alive!  I continue to get the house ready for Jimmy's return home. whenever that may be!  I fix things up around the house, as I know he will like it.  My husband is a cleanlinest freak, so I try to "clean everything."  I'm in the process of steam- cleaning the rugs...I hate rugs.  In my home in Las Vegas, I threw all wall-to-wall carpets out and tiled the entire house.  Today I transported books from the bedroom to the spare room.  Tomorrow, I'll go to Walmart to look for more shelves.  And so that is what life is like for me.  When this time of night comes (12 MIDNIGHT), it is best for me to just stop everything, and throw myself in bed...and start all over tomorrow.  Without your husband here, life just isn't the same....I've had dozens upon dozens of people tell me,  "come out with me.  You need to get out.  You need some loving.  Your husbands not here...he'll never know. "  50% of marriages in America end in divorce.  I myself am the product of a divorced mother and father.  Does it surprise you?  There are no morals left in our country.  Yes, I need to be loved, to be touched, to be kissed , to be held......but I will have to wait for Jimmy to come home.  .......Jimmy is in my heart, my body and my soul........And that is what it's all about, my friends!

Please all my fellow Prison Wives, write a comment, or e-mail me.  Tell me your thoughts and feelings.  Let us support each other at this trying time.............I'm probably the only one who knows what's in your mind and soul, because I go through it , too, along with you.............FRAN