Tuesday, June 15, 2004

Thunderstorms ....

I left the last entry ...hanging...because a thunderstorm came suddenly, and I'm scared of thunder and lightening.  As a child, of 10 or younger, my mother would gather me and my 2 sisters in the living room, on the floor near her, as she sat in her rocking chair.  She would hold her rosary beads and say the rosary.  She would also say an Italian prayer, in Italian, that translates, "dear God, please make the bolts of lightening go higher and higher in the sky, away from us, and protect us.".....So it's no wonder that I'm afraid of thunderstorms, because my mother taught me to fear them at an early age.  My first thunderstorm with Jimmy was July 4, 2001, in Mount Charleston, Nevada.  We had gone there for a couple of days for my birthday and we were on the 3rd floor, high in the mountains....close to the sky and clouds....closer than I've ever been to a thunderstorm.  Flashes of lightening filled the room!....The rain poured down in a fury.  Jimmy, knowing I was afraid, pulled me down on the bed with him.  He sat up in the bed, with me in front of him, sitting between his legs, my back to him.  He locked his arms around me.....very, very tight....my husband is a very strong man...the strength of his arms is unimaginable.  He held me so tight against him, I can still remember his strength and how I couldn't move at all.  He whispered in my ear, as the thunderstorm raged..."Fran, now we will be struck together if lightening strikes us...we are one."  And so my fear subsided.  I relaxed my body.  I knew he was right.  Finally it ended....And it was a very close storm!..................................................................Well, tonite we talked on the phone about what food I hould brinmg him in the evaluation center.  Of course he said he only wanted me, but that's beside the point!.........We're Italian, and we like to eat a lot!.....I decided on pizza....Jimmy's favorite...2 pizza's with pepperoni!........and a dish of spaghetti and meatballs and sausage from the restaurant.....an Italian sub from WAWA....a roasted chicken with cole slow and potato salad...."What do you want for dessert?" I asked.   "You," he said.  Well unfortunately there's no sex at the evaluatation center........."Fran," he said, "that's too much food"......"Well, you can share it with the other guys," I said.  Anyhow, Jimmy did agree on pizza and the Italian sub.  Truthfully, we could care less about food.  But it is stuff to think about, as we bide our time to seeing one another.  He saw the captain today, and Jimmy is next in line to go.  We think it should be within the next 2 weeks.  I have occupied my mind with cleaning and de-cluttering our house....it is better than sitting ad waiting....so I've become almost fanatical, cleaning and re-arranging from morn till night.  Closets, kitchen cabinets....here I come!..........Jimmy will stay at the evaluation center for a minimum of 35 days.  There are oaths, etc. that he must memorize before they will release him.  Of course, you know my husband....he has everything memorized already.....So at the evaluation center, I can visit him and touch him and kiss him, and bring food.  After the 35 days, he will go to the half-way house.  Jimmy thinks he will be eligible for week-end furloughs almost immediatly...in a few weeks...so he will come home on Friday's and go back on Sunday 's.  He will work and have a regular job.....And that is how our life will be, until October, when he is up for parole.  WHEW!........what a process this whole thing is!...I never in my wildest dreams ever could imagine that I'd be part of the prison system..........it's almost like a dream.........but it's better for me now....it is reality for me now....and it's really not that horrible, if you keep your head and your senses about you.  It is "just a process," you have to go through............My Jimmy, I am your wife, your partner, your soulmate, your woman....and I stand by your side in all things.  From the beginning of our marriage, I told Jimmy, "I am happy just to be your wife...just to be Mrs....  that;s all I want....to be by your side..............................Fran

3 comments:

crystalmoon222 said...

Thanks Dawn, for your beautiful comment!...thanks for thinking about us on your way to New England!....Gee, it must be beautiful up there this time of year!...I sent you a pix...hope you got it!.........Fran

dakotarose2852 said...

Fran, your news is getting better and better.  I think I'm as excited for you and Jimmy to be together again as you are.  Through your journal I think I've come to know you pretty well, as well as it's possible through this medium.  I want so much for you to have what you really want, your Jimmy in your arms again.  Soon, my friend, soon!
Susan

sdrogerson said...

I'm so glad things are getting better for you.
Keep the faith!
http://journals.aol.co.uk/sdrogerson/SpecimenDays