Sunday, July 18, 2004

"Peace, Balance, and Harmony"

Hi Everyone!  I'm back to writing again, and my journal is corrected so you can all read it properly, thanks to Stuart, in Scotland...he was able to figure out what was wrong...I had to erase the "wingdings." (Stuart has a great journal! It's called  "SPECIMAN DAYS"....Sdrogerson.  Try to stop by and read it!)

This coming Tuesday, Jimmy's friend will take me to Talbot.  We will leave at 5pm, and the "marriage counseling session" will start at 7pm.  I am really excited.  I have never been in that kind of scenerio with my husband...in a group setting.  I know Jimmy talks alot , and I'm kind of quiet (kind of, I said...not always).  Actually, the counselor has asked Jimmy that I be a guest speaker one Tuesday, and lead a session. He said to Jimmy, "your wife has a Masters degree from Columbia University, so she is highly qualified."  I am very honored for him to ask me, but I really doubt it, at this point , I can do such a thing.  Maybe one day, but right now, I'm still mentally and physically recovering from this whole prison thing.  My emotions play tricks with me, and I may suddenly burst out crying!  Also, I never liked standing in front of an audience speaking.  I am not a speaker.  I am one of those people that freeze up in front of an audience.  Now, I can speak to you on a one-to -one basis, or through writing.  That's ok.  However, I have been blessed twice, to have in my life 2 very brillant men, who are out-spoken, and have the gift of speech.  Both, yes both, are wonderful, intellectual speakers.  The man I lived with, before Jimmy, for 28 years was a Professor of International business and Marketing, and my Jimmy, my life, has a Doctorate in Law from New York University....If you saw Jimmy in a room, you'd notice him right away.  He's the man that stands out!  The leader in the room.  He has a way of totally controlling the room.  However, not in a strict sort of way, but he is very humerous, too.  And nothing goes by him.  He sees everything, and remembers everything. And of course, with me by his side, he'd be holding my hand very tightly, treating me with lots of respect, and treating me very nice..taking care of me.  Jimmy puts me on a pedestal...I smile, I laugh, I relax when I am with him...

And so, like I said, we are both very excited.  Just to touch him, kiss him, look into his eyes...it will seem like a dream.  Jimmy told me not to come there yesterday, Saturday, because he knows his wife, and he wanted me to rest a little.  After Tuesday's visit, I will probably go next Saturday, for the all-day visit.  I get tired very easily, and am not physically as strong as I once was, so I try to take things slowly.  I have trouble walking, and have lots of body pain...something like arthritis, but the doctor's say it's neuropathy.  Lately, it;s very difficult for me to even step up on the curb.  My cane is my life-saver.  I call it "little Jimmy."  It has always accompanied me, since Jimmy left.  Usually, Jimmy holds on to me, but now I use the cane!  Well, hopefully things will get better1

Last week Jimmy took the test that will help him to progress out of Talbot Rehab Center, to the Half-way house.  It was a test about things he had to memorize...oaths, etc. about never again doing things and committing crimes to hurt your family.  Jimmy passed with flying colors!  He got something like 1 wrong!  The counselor said it is better he did not get 100%, or else they would have thought he'd cheated.  I told Jimmy, there was an episode on "ST. JOAN OF ARCADIA" this year about the same subject.  Did any of you watch that?  I liked that show alot!

On Friday, my Aunt and sister took me out for my birthday!...Yes, I'm starting to step out, after 16 months!  They took me to a lovely Italian restaurant, called "Luigi's." Delicious food....we all had "flounder francais," along with salad, split pea soup, freshly baked rolls, and angel hair pasta with marinara sause. I really had a great time!  There was a male singer there, who sang romantic songs, and many Italian love songs.  He sang me "Happy Birthday," as the cake with candles came to the table.  He stood next to me and sang, and announced to the crowded room that I am from Las Vegas.  Take me back with you to Las Vegas, he pleaded!  Actually, he knows my husband, as we were going to this restaurant before Jimmy left..........It was a very joyous night!  We laughed the whole time, and talked.  My sister , who is 9 years older than me, told me about her latest "fling," and how great this man is!  My aunt, who lost her husband a few months ago, is all excited about the new computer she is getting...a dell laptop. This will give her something to learn and keep busy with. She was influenced by me, because I always tell her about the computer, and how important it is in my life.  My aunt is very lonely since her husband died, and she calls me everyday, and talks for hours . This will keep her busy.

Well, guess I said enough!.....Bye, and thanks for all your great comments!...........................FRAN

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hello Fran~

i am the same way as you-I cannot talk in front of an audience.  In fact, I really don't like crowds period!

Tkae it easy for awhile, then you will be well rested for your all day visit with Jimmy!

i'm so excited for you.  I can just hear your excited and see your love for your husband.  It makes my heart sing to see that much love for your hubby!

Jan

Anonymous said...

Hi Jan!  Thanks for your nice comment.........Yes, I'm very much in love with Jimmy...he is my whole life........

Anonymous said...

Fran I know how you feel I waited on my husband