Friday, June 30, 2006

HI!

HI EVERYONE!

JUST A QUICK STOP BY HERE, TO LET YOU KNOW THINGS ARE GOING GREAT!

JIMMY CAME HOME YESTERDAY, THURSDAY, AND WE HAD A GREAT DAY!  HE'S COMING BACK AGAIN TOMORROW, ON SATURDAY, FOR MY BIRTJHDAY, WHICH IS JULY 1ST!

HE'LL TAKE ME OUT FOR A BIRTHDAY LUNCHEON, IN ONE OF OUR FAVORITE AND ROMANTIC RESTAURANTS.............A CHINESE RESTAURANT.  IT IS THE SAME RESTAURANT WE WENT TO MANY TIMES BEFORE HE WENT TO PRISON, WHICH WAS OUR SPECIAL LITTLE ROMANTIC SPOT..................HE WILL ORDER A POU-[OU PLATTER, WHICH IS ROUMD WOODEN PLATTER, WHICH TURNS AROUND, AND HAS DELICIOS CHINESE APPETIZERS ON IT, WITH A LITTLE BUNSON BURNER KEEPING IT WARM.  KNOWING JIMMY, HE WILL HOLD MY HAND, ACROSS THE TABLE, ALMOST THE WHOLE TIME, STARING INTO MY EYES.............................THEN, WE WILL ORDER SOME SOUP, EGG ROLLS, AND MAIN PLATTERS.................AND OF COURSE, AFTERWARDS IS THE FORTUNE COOKIE, WHICH WE LOVE TO OPEN............THROUGHOUT THE MEAL, WE WILL HAVE A POT OF CHINESE TEA, ON THE TABLE..

WE LOVE GOING TO A SIT DOWN MEAL IN A RESTAURANT, INSTEAD OF CHINESE BUFFETS............THIS WAY, IT IS MOR ROMANTIC, AND WE CAN SAVOR THE FOOD, FEEL EACH OTHERS LOVE BETWEEN US, AND THEN AFTERWARDS GO HOME AND MAKE LOVE...........................HE SAYS, TOMORROW IS DEDICATED TO ME.

FOR THE PAST 3 BIRTHDAYS, I HAVE BEEN ALONE, WITHOUT JIMMY..................SO NOW, THIS IS A VERY BIG TREAT FOR ME.

MY HUSBAND ALWAYS CALLS ME HIS "BABY,"  AND ALWAYS TAKES SUCH GOOD CARE OF ME!

ALSO, MY HEALTH IS GOING GOOD RIGHT NOW!

BYE, FOR NOW!................................FRAN

Monday, June 26, 2006

HELLO!........I'M AT HOME!

JIMMY CAME HOME YESTERDAY, AND TOOK ME TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM RIGHT AWAY.  WE ARE THANKFUL HE GOT AN EMERGENCEY PASS FROM HOPE HALL, TO COME HOME TO TAKE ME TO THE ER, SINCE MY RIGHT LEG HAD NOT GOTTEN ANY BETTER.

I AM SO HAPPY THAT MY HUSBAND WAS ABLE TO TAKE ME THERE.YOU HAVE NO IDEA.  WHEN JIMMY IS WITH ME, LIFE SEEMS HAPPIER, AND LIGHTER. 

HE ARRIVED AT HOME A LITTLR AFTER 8 AM, AND BY 9:30 AM OR SO, WE WERE AT THE ER.

THEY TOOK 6 VIALS OF BLOOD FROM ME AND TOOK X-RAYS OF MY RIGHT FOOT.  THE DOCTOR WAS A WONDERFUL MAN....SO PLEASANT, SO UNDERSTANDING, AND A BLESSING TO BE WITH!

THE X-RAY SHOWED SOME SOFT TISSUE SWELLING OF THE RIGHT FOOT, IN THE HEEL AREA, AND A
"HEEL SPUR."

I EXPLAINED TO THE DOCTOR THAT MY ENTIRE LEG IS VERY NUMB, AND HURTING, AND IT SEELS  LIKE I KEEP GETTING THROWN OFF BALANCE WHEN WALKING....AS IF TO FALL.

HE KEPT ME ON ANTIBIOTICS, AS THERE WAS SOME INFECTION THERE IN THE LEG, WITH A LOW GRADE TEMP.  THE LEG IS STILL SWOLLEN, AND I HAVE TROUBLE PUTTING PRESSURE ON IT WHILE WALKING.

HE TOLD ME IT WAS GOOD I CAME TO THE ER, AS BEING A DIABETIC I HAVE TO BE VERY CAREFUL FOR ANYTHING WITH THE FEET/LEGS, AS I HAD THE AMPUTATION OF THE TOE OF THE OTHER LEG BEFORE.

HE SAID IF I SEE ANY FUTHER REDNESS OR SWELLING, OR SPREADING UP MY LEG, I AM TO COME BACK TO THE HOSPITAL.

SO, JIMMY AND I WERE VERY HAPPY , THAT I DID NOT HAVE TO BE ADMITTED FOR E IV ANTIBIOTICS.

HOWEVER, WOULDN;'T YOU KNOW IT, I FELL LATER ON THAT DAY!

WHAT HAPPENED WAS THAT AS JIMMY WAS LEAVING TO GO BACK TO HOPE HALL, HE CLOSED THE DOOR, AND WALKED OUT, AS USUAL.  THEN , PRINCE AND I ALWAYS WALK TO THE BEDROOM WINDOW TO WAVE GOOD-BYE TO HIM.  PRINCE WAS SO EXCITED , HE PUSHED AGAINST MY LEFET LEG, AND SENT ME FLYING FORWARD, FACE DOWN ON THE FLOOR.  I SCREAMED OUT TO JIMMY, AS HE WAS WALKING ACROSS THE LAWN.  HE RAN BACK TO THE WINDOW, AND COULD NOT COME BACK IN THE HOUSE, BECAUSE THE DOOR WAS LOCKED, AND HE HAD NO KEY.

SO, HE TALKED TO ME THROUGH THE WINDOW.  HE WAS READY TO TAKE THE SCREEN DOWN, AND CLIMB THROUGH THE WINDOW.  FORTUNATELY I WAS ABLE TO PULL MYSELF UP.  I THEN WALKED TO THE FRONT DOOR, AND HE CHECKED MY KNEES AND LEGS.  EVERYTHING WAS OK, BUT I WAS SHAKEN UP, AND THE RIGHT LEG HURTS MORE THAN EVER TODAY, AND IS QUITE SWOLLEN.

SO, NOW I AM MANAGING TO GET AROUND THE HOUSE, USING MY CANE AND WHEELCHAIR...................WHAT CAN I SAY!.....................IT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING,

DESPITE EVERYTHING, JIMMY AND I HAD A GREAT DAY!  HE IS A WONDERFUL MAN AND HUSBAND.....THAT IS ALL I CAN SAY................HE TOOK CARE OF ME ALL DAY, AND HE SAYS HE JUST LOVES TO DO IT!.....IT'S INCREDIBLE TO FIND AN ASPECT IN A MAN LIKE THAT!

HE COOKED ROASTED PAPRIKA CHICKEN THIGHS, ALONG WITH A DELICIOUS DISH OF SAUTEED POTATOES, WITH ONIONS AND MUSHROOMS.............I JUST LOVED IT!

I HAD A HUGE PITCHER OF CRYSTAL LIGHT ICED TEA FOR HIM, WHICH HE LOVES, AND I ALSO MADE SOME COFFEE..................WHICH HE LOVES HOW I MAKE THE COFFEE!

HE HAD ME REST ALL DAY, AND GAVE ME MASSAGES THROUGHOUT THE DAY..................

HE HAD BOUGHT ME A BEAUTIFUL BOUQUET OF FLOWERS, AND A BIRTHDAY BARBIE DOLL, AS I COLLECT BARBIE DOLLS, AND JULY 1ST IS MY BIRTHDAY.

WE WATCHED SOME SHOWS ON TV TOGETHER, AND OF COURSE LAID IN EACH OTHER;S ARMS A GOOD PART OF THE DAY!

JIMMY AND I ARE LIKE A CHEMICAL REACTION, WHEN TOGETHER................WE HAVE A LOT OF ENERGY BETWEEN US...............A LOT OF LOVE FLOWING , AND PEOPLE ALWAYS SEE THAT IN US.................WE OURSELVES FEEL THAT WHEN TOGETHER, AND IT IS AMAZING............

WE ARE ALWAYS HAPPY PEOPLE, TALKING, DISCUSSING THINGS..............LAUGHING.............AND SIMPLY FLOWING THROUGH LIFE!

ALTHOUGH WE ALL HAVE SOME OBSTACLES IN LIFE, AS WE ARE HUMAN, WE MUST LEARN TO FLOW THROUGH IT, IN ORDER TO MAKE LIFE'S JOURNEY A PLEASANT ONE, AND PRODUCTIVE ONE.

AND AFTER JIMMY LEFT, I WENT INTO THE KITCHEN.  EVERYTHING WAS SPOTLESS!................ALL DISHES WASHED, GARBAGE OUT.HE EVEN WASHED THE KITCHEN TOWELS!......................WHAT A HUSBAND!..........EH!.....I LOVE HIM SO!

..............................................FRAN

Friday, June 23, 2006

WAITING FOR SUNDAY

I JUST CAN'T WAIT FOR SUNDAY, THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW, WHEN JIMMY WILL COME HOME AGAIN!

WE SPOKE ON THE PHONE SEVERAL TIMES TODAY, AND WE CAN;T WAIT TO BE TOGETHER AGAIN....IT IS JUST THAT THE MORE WE SEE  EACH OTHER, THE MORE WE WANT.  ..........................IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THAT, EVER SINCE WE FIRST NEW EACH OTHER. 

WELL THIS TIME, JIMMY WILL BE BRINGING ME TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM, AS SOON AS HE GETS HERE......WE ARE HOPING THEY WILL NOT ADMIT ME, BUT THERE IS A VERY GOOD CHANCE THEY WILL, FOR ANTIBIOTIC THERAPY, AS I HAVE AN INFECTION IN MY RIGHT LEG, AND I AM JUST HOPING IT CAN LAST 1 MORE DAY...............THE LEG HAS A SWOLLEN AREA ON THE ANKLE/HEEL AREA AND THE ENTIRE LEG IS SWOLLEN, AND WARM, AND PAINFUL TO WALK ON.  ACTUALLY, I AM HAVING TROUBLE WALKING, AND I ALMOST LOSE BALANCE AND ALMOST TEND TO START FALLING...SO, I'M USING MY CANE AND WHEELCHAIR IN THE HOUSE......................IT IS ALWAYS SOMETHING, AND I AM READY TO GET THIS TAKEN CARE OF, AND MOVE ON TO OTHER THINGS.

THE LAST TIME I WENT TO THE HOSPITAL WAS 2004.  I HAD GANGRENE OF MY TOE, AND A LARGE ABCESS IN MY FOOT...I ALMOST DIED, BEING IN THE HOSPITAL FOR 6 WEEKS, GIVEN MASSIVE IV ANTIBX THERAPY, AND 4 UNITS OF BLOOD FOR SEVERE ANEMIA.  MY TOE WAS AMPUTATED, AND THE FOOT CUT WIDE OPEN TO REMOVE A LARGE ABCESS, THE SIZE OF ALMOST A BASEBALL.

I WAS IN SEPTIC SHOCK.

THE TROUBLE WAS, MY HUSBAND WAS NO WHERE AROUND FOR ME.....THE DAY I WAS BROUGHT TO SURGERY, HE WAS BEING TRANSPORTED FROM BAYSIDE STATE PRISON, TO KINTOCK HALF-WAY HOUSE. 

I WAS ALONE, AND THAT'S ALL THERE WAS TO IT.  AT LEAST AT THAT TIME, I HAD THE SENSE TO TRANSFER MY CALLS, VIA CALL FORWARDING, TO THE HOSPITAL, SO THAT JIMMY WAS IN CONSTANT COMMUNICATION WITH ME. ON THE PHONE.

THE DOCTOR'S, AND THERE WERE 9 OF THEM, WORKING ON ME, HAD LOST HOPE.  THEY THOUGHT I WOULD DIE.  AND SO, THEY TOLD MY SISTER, I WOULD NOT MAKE IT.  THEY ASKED HER IF "MY THINGS WERE IN ORDER."..............SHE TOLD THEM NOT TO TELL ME I WAS DYING.UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES.  I GUESS SHE REMEMBERED THAT I DON'T BELIEVE IN TELLING ANY SICK PERSON THEY ARE DYING...............BEING AN RN FOR 28 YEARS, I KNOW THAT THE DOCTOR MAY BE A SMART MAN, BUT ......"HE IS NOT GOD."

I DO NOT BELIEVE IN TELLING THE PATIENT , "YOU HAVE 3 MONTHS TO LIVE.'..........................NO WAY!...........................................THAT IS MY BELIEF, AND I DON'T ASK ANYONE TO AGREE WITH ME.

AND SO, LET ME TELL YOU, WHEN YOU ARE NEAR DEATH, YOU SIMPLY KNOW IT.  NO ONE HAD TO TELL ME. MY BODY SIMPLY WAS NOT RESPONDING TO THE ANTIBIOTICS.............................I ALSO HAD MRSA, WHICH IS A STAPH INFECTION, THAT MANY PEOPLE DIE FROM...........................FROM MY FOOT, IT HAD TAKEN OVER MY WHOLE BODY AND BRAIN.

SO, I LISTENED TO JIMMY ON THE PHONE, FOR 6 WEEKS.

I LISTENED AND LISTENED, AND CRIED TO HIM INTO THE PHONE. I COULD BARELY TALK................BUT I COULD CRY.AND I COULD LISTEN TO HIS VOICE, AND HIS BREATH........... HE WAS MY SOURCE OF ENERGY..................HE TOLD ME AROUND A MILLION TIMES THAT I WOULD MAKE IT..............THAT I WOULD GET BETTER.

I COULD BARELY TALK OR MOVE, BUT I SIMPLY LISTEBED TO HIS WORDS. 

AND THEN, HE WOULD TELL ME HOW HE HAD THE GUYS IN PRISON FORM PRAY CHAIN, CIRCLES...AMD HOW THE MEN WERE PRAYING INTENSELY FOR ME......................AND JIMMY WOULD LEAD THE PRAYERS IN THE PRISON, WITH THE OTHER MEN..................

YES, THAT IS HOW I LEARNED THAT EVEN CRIMINALS IN PRISON HAVE VERY STRONG POWERS OF PRAYER............

YES, GOD LISTENS A LOT TO THOSE MEN.........

THEY HAVE TIME........

THEY ARE DOING TIME.

MANY OF THOSE CRIMINALS REALIZE THEY HAVE NO ONE BUT GOD......AND SO, THEY PRAY, I BELIEVE, WITH VERY INTENSE PRAYERS.................

THEY ARE LOCKED UP, WITH NO WAY OUT.  AND SO, THEY INSTEAD TURN INWARD, TO GOD, WHO DWELLS WITHIN......

AND YES, I WAS FINALLY HEALED.

AND AFTER I WAS HOME, I HAD TO GO VISIT MY SURGEON EVERY WEEK......................AND, EVERY WEEK HE WOULD TELL ME, "I HAVE TO DO 2 MORE SURGERIES ON YOUR FOOT."

AND IN MY HEAD, I WOULD SAY, OVER AND OVER..........."NEVER.  I'M NOT GOING BACK TO THAT HOSPITAL BED."

AND SO, I TOOK CARE OF MY OWN FOOT WOUND.  I PUT MY SELF IN THE SHOWER TWICE A DAY, AND USED THE SHOWER SPRAY, TO CLEANSE THE WOUND....I PUT ON THE OINTMENT PRESCRIBED BY THE DOCTOR, AND THEN DRESSED THE WOUND..............................THAT FOOT WOUND WAS SOMETHING LIKE 2 INCHES DEEP, AND 9 INCEHES LONG.............I LITEALLY PUT MY FINGERS INSIDE MY OWN WOUND, WHEN I PACKED IT..............BUT I DIDN'T MIND............I'M VERY STROMG MINDED, AND ONLY NEW I HAD TO GET BETTER............

AND, AROUND 1 MONTH LATER, THE WEEK BEFORE CHRISTMAS, I WENT TO SEE HIM, AND HE LOOKED UP AT ME AND SAID,   "MY GOSH, YOU HAVE A MIRACULOUS HEALING POWER WITHIN YOU!  I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!  I DO NOT HAVE TO DO ANY FURTHER SURGERY ON YOUR FOOT....IT IS BEGINNING TO HEAL!"

AND YES..................THAT IS WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT....................................PRAYER, STRENGTH, POWER, LOVE....................YOU NAME IT, THAT'S WHAT IT IS ALL ABOUT......

AND SO,. ONCE AGAIN, I WILL GO AND GET CHECKED OUT .  I PROMISED MYSELF NEVER TO GO BACK TO THAT SCARY HOSPIRAL AGAIN.  NUT NOW THAT JIMMY IS ON PAROLLE, AND IN A HALF0WAY HOUSE, HE HAS GOTTEN SPECIAL PERMISSION TO BRING ME THERE.

AND SO IN MY MIND, I WILL SIMPLY THINK OF IT (THIS SUNDAY),  AS A DAY OF LOVE..WE WILL BE TOGETHER, AND I WILL GO AND GET HEALED ONCE AGAIN, AND EVERYTHING WILL BE JUST FINE............................

............LIFE IS GOING SO GREAT RIGHT NOW, WE CAN;T MESS THINGS UP WITH MY HEALTH........................AND JIMMY AND I, BEING 2 VERY STRONG PEOPLE, WILL JUST NOT LET MEDICAL PROBLEMS INTERFERE...................AND WE BOTH HAVE AN IMMESELY STRONG BELIEF IN GOD AND THE UNIVERSE.................AND THE POWER OF FAITH, PRAYER, AND HEALING.

THANK YOU  ALL FOR READING MY JOURNAL.  I HAVE WRITTEN IT SINCE DEC. 31, 2003, NEW YEAR'S EVE, WHEN I WAS LONELY AND DEPRESSED, WITH A HUSBAND IN PRISON.  MY JOURNAL BECAME MY FRIEND.  I TALKED ABOUT THE DAY TO DAY EXPERIENCEX OF BEING A PRISONER'S WIFE.  THE UPS AND DOWNS..........THE TEARS AND LAUGHTER....................AND OF COURSE ABOUT OUR INTENSE LOVE.  HOW A LOVE CAN EVEN STRENGTHEN AND GROW, DESPITE PRISON WALLS.......................HOW MY LIFE WAS TOTALLY DEDICATED TO MY HUSBAND WHO WAS IN PRISON.................

AND NOW, TIME HAS MOVED ON...........3.3. YEARS TO BE EXACT.  JIMMY IS IN A HALF-WAY HOUSE, ON PAROLE, HAS A JOB, AND HAS PASSES HOME EACH WEEK.  TIME MOVES ON, AND WE PROGRESS ALONG IN TIME.  AND NOW, JIMMY HOPEFULLY WILL COME HOME SOON, IN A FEW MONTHS.

LIFE IS A PROGRESSION.....................AND WE AS INDIVIDUAL PEOPLE PROGRESS THROUGH IT..............I LOVE TO SAY  , 'LIFE IS A JOURNEY."................AND WE, AS PEOPLE ARE PART OF THAT JOURNEY.

LIFE IS ALSO LIKE A BIG QUILT.  AND WE ARE ALL CONNECTED ON THAT QUILT.

GOOD-NIGHT EVERYONE.  I GUESS I SHOULD START RIGHT NOW, TO ASK YOU FOR YOUR POWERFUL PRAYERS, THAT ALL GOES WELL FOR JIMMY AND I ON SUNDAY.

GOOD-NIGHT!.................................FRAN

 

Thursday, June 22, 2006

JIMMY WAS HOME

JIMMY WAS HOME TODAY, ARRIVING 8AM, AND LEFT AT 8 PM, AND WE HAD  A GREAT DAY!  WE DID SO MANY THINGS, AND ACCOMPLISHED SO MUCH, IT IS HARD TO BELIEVE!

JIMMY TOOK ME FOR MY BLOODWORK, AND WILL RETURN HOME, GODWILLING IN 3 DAYS, ON SUNDAY, AS HE WILL TAKE ME TO THE ER, AS I HAVE A LITTLE INFECTION IN MY RIGHT LEG, AROUND THE ANKLE/HEEL AREA, AND I'M ON ANTI-BX, AT THE PRESENT.

WE ALSO TOOK PRINCE TO THE VET, FOR HIS SHOTS AND EXAM....IT WAS THE FIRST TIME IN A VERY LONG TIME, THAT PRINCE HAD BEEN OUT RIDING IN THE CAR...........AROUND THE 3.3. YEARS SINCE JIMMY WAS INCARCERATED.  SO, HE WAS A LITTLE ANXIOUS, BUT THEN HE ENJOYED HIMSELF, ONCE WE GOT TO THE VET. HE LOVED THE OTHER DOGGIES WHO WERE THERE, AND AS WE WALKED IN, THERE WAS A BEAUTIFUL MASTIF THERE WITH HIS OWNER! 

(we spent close to $500.99 for a few shots, and bloodwork, and pills for prince.)..........VET VISITS ARE NOT CHEAP, BUT WE LOVE OUR PETS, SO IT DOESN'T MATTER!

PRINCE WILL BE GOING IN FOR SURGERY IN A FEW WEEKS , TO HAVE A SMALL GROWTH FROM HIS EYELID, REMOVED,, WHICH HAS BEEN GROWING LARGER.

SO, YOU CAN SEE, EVERYONE IS HAPPY WHEN JIMMY........DAHHY............... IS HOME.

JIMMY COOKS , CLEANS, AND DOES SO MUCH WHEN HE IS HOME.  HE SAYS HE LOVES DOING IT, AND IT MAKES HIM FEEL GOOD.  THAT IS HOW MY HUSBAND IS, AND THAT IS WHY I LOVE HIM. 

TODAY, HE MADE  RAVIOLI'S WITH A DELICIOUS TOMATO MEAT SAUCE....................

WE WATCHED A RENTED MOVIE TOGETHER, CALLED "THE NOTEBOOK."

HE ALSO DID  SOME WORK ON THE COMPUTER, FIXNG IT UP, ETC.

I AM A LUCKY WOMAN TO HAVE A MAN LIKE THIS FOR A HUSBAND.

WE ARE ONLY TOGETHER FOR 12 HOURS, AND YET WE DO SO MUCH.........................AND OF COURSE, WE ARE HUGGING AND KISSING, THE WHOLE TIME.  HE OPENS EVERY CAR DOOR, AND EVERY DOOF I WALK THROUGH.  JIMMY HAS ALWAYS DONE THIS.  IN THE 5 YEARS WE ARE MARRIED, , I HAVE NEVER OPENED A DOOR FOR MYSELF, WHEN IN MY HUSBAND'S PRESENCE...........

BEFORE I SAY GOOD-NIGHT, I WOULD LIKE TO CONGRATULATE  KATE, WHOSE JOURNAL IS CALLED, "AN ANALYSIS OF LIFE."  SHE IS GUEST EDITOR THIS WEEK, AND HAS SELECTED MY JOURNAL AS ONE OF HER 8 PICKS.  THANK YOU SO MUCH , KATE, AND I AM HONORED TO BE SELECTED.  I WAS SO SURPRISED AFTER JIMMY LEFT TONIGHT, AND I OPENED THE COMPUTER, AND FOUND OUT THIS JOURNAL WAS SELECTED AS ONE OF HER 8 PICKS!.........................IT WAS SUCH A WONDERFUL WAY TO END MY DAY......................A DAY WHICH WAS SO BEAUTIFUL TO SPEND WITH JIMMY, AND THEN , KATE TOPPED IT OFF FOR ME!

WELL GOOD-NIGHT, EVERYONE, AND MAY YOU ALL HAVE SWEET DREAMS.........................................FRAN

 

Monday, June 19, 2006

JIMMY WILL BE COMING HOME ON THURSDAY

JIMMY WILL BE COMING HOME ON THURSDAY, JUST 2 DAYS AWAY, AND BOTH OF US CAN'T WAIT.

WE FEEL SO EXCITED.  THE MORE WE ARE TOGETHER, THE MORE WE WANT TO BE TOGETHER.

WE CRAVE EACH OTHER...........

WE ARE EACH OTHER'S BEST FRIEND...............

WE JUST LOVE BEING WITH EACH OTHER, TALKING TO EACH OTHER, AND WE NEVER TIRE OF EACH OTHER.

JIMMY IS A VERY OUT-GOING, SOCIAL PERSON.............PEOPLE LOVE HIM, AND HAVE FOR HIS WHOLE LIFE. 

AS FOR ME, I AM IN ONE WAY OUT-SPOKEN, BUT IN ANIOTHER WAY, I AM VERY QUIET.

I LIKE TO BE ALONE ALOT..............AND THINK ABOUT THINGS, AND ANALYZE THINGS AND PEOPLE.........

MY MOTHER ALWAYS TOLD ME, YOU ARE LIKE GRETA GARBO, WHOSE FAMOUS WORDS WERE, "I WANT TO BE ALONE."

JIMMY SHOOCKED ME ON THE PHONE TONIGHT.  HE TOLD ME THE SAME WORDS, NOT KNOWING MY MOM HAD ALWAYS TOLD ME THAT.................
"YOU ARE JUST LIKE GRETA GARBO,"   HE SAID.  "YOU ALWAYS SAY, ' I WANT TO BE ALONE." 

"HOWEVER WITH ME, YOU LIKE TO BE AROUND PEOPLE, AND ARE MORE OUTGOING, AND SOCIAL."  HE SAID

JIMMY IS RIGHT.  I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THAT.  I BECOME MORE OF A SOCIAL BEING, WHEN MY STRONG MAN IS WITH ME.................................

I WAS LIKE THAT WITH THE PREVIOUS MAN IN MY LIFE, WHO WAS A PROFESSOR, AND VERY SOCIAL.............

YESTERDAY WAS FATHER'S DAY, AND I MUST TELL YOU, JIMMY IS IN MANY WAYS LIKE A DADDY TO ME.  I EVEN CALL HIM DADDY, VERY OFTEN.  MANY PEOPLE MAY FIND THIS CONCEPT HARD TO UNDERSTAND.  BUT WE ARE ACTUALLY 2 VERY GROUNDED PEOPLE, INTELLIGENT ENOUGH TO HAVE A DEEP UNDERSTANDING OF THINGS.................SO, THIS CONCEPT HAS DEEP PSYCHOLOGICAL MEANINGS................................IN THE SAME WAY, I GUESS I AM LIKE A MOTHER TO HIM.  YOU SEE, I AM THE ONE PERSON MY HUSBAND LOVES SO INTENSELY, THAT I AM THE ONE PERSON IN THIS WOR;LD HE WILL LISTEN TO................WE EACH HAVE A GREAT POWER AND CONTROL OVER EACH OTHER..................WE ARE LIKE ELECTRICITY, AND WHEN TOGETHER, EVEN ONLY IN OUR THOUGHTS, WE GIVE OFF A STRONG IMPACT, TO THE WORLD AROUND US.................ALONE, I AM NOTHING, AND FOR JIMMY, IF HE DID NOT HAVE ME, HE WOULD BE NOTHING, AS HE SAYS HE LIVES FOR ME.................BOTH OF US AGREE TO THIS.

AND SO I FEEL SO HAPPY.  JIMMY WILL ONCE AGAIN ARRIVE AT 8 AM, OR SO.  HE WILL TAKE ME TO THE LAB TO HAVE MY BLOODWORK DRAWN.  THEN AT 11 AM, WE WILL BRING PRINCE TO THE VET FOR HS SHOTS.  THEN WE WILL COME HOME AND REST IN EACH OTHER'S ARMS.  WE MAY WATCH THE MOVIE, "MEMOIRS OF A GEISHA," WHICH IS PLAYING ON "ON DEMAND."

WE WILL HAVE PIZZA, AND I WILL MAKE AN ITALIAN DISH CALLED ESCAROLE Y FAGOLIA, MEANING ESCAROLE AND BEANS, MADE IN OLIVE OIL AND GARLIC, WHICH WE BOTH LIKE.  THERE ARE STEAKS IN THR FREEZER IF JIMMY WOULD LIKE ME TO MAKE HIM ONE.

JIMMY HAS AN ENORMOUS AMOUNT OF ENERGY.  HE WORKS EVERYDAY IN THE FOODSTORE, TRAVELING BACK AND FORTH FOR 1-2 HOURS, AND ON HIS DAY OFF, HE COMES HOME.  BEFORE HE GOES TO WORK, HE CALLS ME,  BEFORE 6AM.  I'M USUALLY ASLEEP.  HE SAYS HE WANTS TO JUST HEAR ME SLEEPING...TO HEAR MY BREATEH ON THE PHONE............................

AND SO, I WILL SAY GOOD-NITE, FOR NOW............MAY YOU ALL HAVE AS GREAT A LOVE, WITH YOUR LOVED ONE, AS JIMMY AND I HAVE!........................FRAN

 

Thursday, June 15, 2006

ANSWER TO A RUDE COMMENT

THIS IS IN RESPONSE TO MUJA, WHOEVER YOU ARE.AND I DON'T CARE WHO YOU ARE..............MEAN PEOPLE LIKE YOU COME INTO MY JOURNAL FROM TIME TO TIME.........

THIS IGNORANT PERSON COMMENTED TODAY IN THE MARCH 30, 2006 ENTRY, TITLED LOGAN HALL, THINGS ARE LOOKING UP.

MY ANSWER TO YOU IS, IF YOU ARE IGNORANT, DON'T LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS HERE, IN MY JOURNAL.

THIS PERSON IS SAYING A MAN ON PAROLE IS NOT IN A HALF-WAY HOUSE.........................

LOOK UP THE RULES, BUDDY, BRFORE YOU SAY FALSE THINGS.......................

JIMMY IS ON PAROLE, AND THERE ARE AROUND 8 OTHER MEN WITH HIM, AT HOPE HALL.................I BELIEVE IT IS IN EVERY STATE THAT SOME PAROLEES ARE NOW PUT IN HALF-WAY HOUSES..............BEFORE BEING RELEASED HOME,.THEREFORE, JIMMY IS NO LONGER IN THE DEPT. OF CORRECTIONS

ALSO, ABOUT LOOKING AT MY HUSBAND'S PIX.YES, ANYONE CAN LOOK AT IT, ON THE COMPUTER, AS IT IS PUBLIC INFO.

TO MAKE THINGS EASIER FOR YOU, I WILL PUT JIMMY'S PIX HERE, IN THIS JOURNAL, FOR YOU TO LOOK AT, TO SEE HOW HANDSOME, AND WONDERFUL HE IS.........THAT SHOULD BE IN A FEW WEEKS.

GET A LIFE, BUDDY!

.........FRAN     :)

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

JIMMY CAME HOME AGAIN!

JIMMY CAME HOME AGAIN, YESTERDAY, WHICH WAS MONDAY................HE ONCE AGAIN ARRIVED BY TAXI AT 8 AM, AND LEFT AT 8 PM.  THE COST OF THE TAXI IS $150.00 FOR 1 WAY...........TOTALING $300.00 FOR BOTH WAYS/  HOWEVER , IT IS WELL WORTH IT, BECAUSE THE RIDE HOME IS ONLY 1 HOUR.  IF HE TOOK MASS TRANSIT, IT WOULD TAKE HIM AROUND 2 TO 3 HOURS , OR SO, OF TRAVELING, AND THAT WOULD CUT DOWN ON OUR TIME TOGETHER...................I TELL YOU, WHAT A STRANGE LIFE WE LEAD!................BUT IT IS OK.WE ARE 2 PEOPLE WHO ARE VERY HAPPY!

WHEN HE ARRIVED. JIMMY ONCE AGAIN MADE BREAKFAST...EGGS, BACON, SAUSAGE...AND I MADE THE COFFEE......................WE RESTED IN BED, AND HE GAVE ME BEAUTIFUL BODY MASSAGES, THAT I NEEDED SO MUCH.............AND HE "LAID THE PIPES!"............(does anyone know what that means?...........it is a slang expreassion, used by guys in prison!)

JIMMY LOVES TO CLEAN THE HOUSE, AND DO THE THINGS I CAN'T DO..SO, HE ONCE AGAIN WASHED THE RUGS, AND MOPPED THE FLOORS.................I HAD BOUGHT A NEW ELECTRONIC CAT BOX, WHICH HE SET UP, AND IS WORKING GREAT....IN OUR HOUSE, THE 2 CATS HAVE THE SECOND BATHROOM, ALL TO THEMSELVES!

HE WORKED ON OUR NEW COMPUTER, WHICH IS WORKING GREAT.................JIMMY IS A COMPUTER WIZ, AND LOVES WORKING ON THIS THING, TO MAKE EVERYTHING PERFECT..............

HE SAYS HE DOES EVERYTHING FOR ME, AND ENJOYS DOING IT.AND HE DOES!.................HE IS A MAN WHO LOVES HIS WIFE, AND ENJOYS DOING THINGS AROUND THE HOUSE.....................HE WANTS TO MAKE OUR HOME AS PERFECT AND PEACEFUL, AS HE CAN.............SO I CAN REST AND BE PEACEFUL HERE.................

LAST WEEK HE TOOK ME TO THE MEDICAL DOCTOR.  YESTERDAY HE TOOK ME TO THE RETINA DOCTOR, FOR MY REGULAR 6 MONTH VISIT, AND DILATION OF MY EYES......THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT MY BLINDNESS HAS NOT WORSEN. MY RETINAS ARE THE SAME.  I TOLD HIM MY EYES ARE BLURRY LATELY, AND I HAVE TROUBLE SEEING THE COMPUTER.HE SAID THAT IS SIMPLY DUE TO MY BLOOD SUGARS GOING UP AND DOWN, NOT THE RETINOPATHY................HE IS HAPPY THAT AT THIS POINT HE DOES NOT HAVE TO DO ANY MORE LASER SURGERY, AS I HAVE HAD SURGERY TWICE IN THE PAST 4 YEARS........FUNNY THING IS, HIS DIAGNOSIS SAYS THAT MY BLINDNESS WILL NOT GET BETTER, BUT WILL DETERIATE................HEE, HEE!..WELL HE'S WRONG SO FAR    :)

SO WE WENT TO THE EYE DOCTOR AND SAT LIKE 2 LOVEBIRDS, IN THE WAITING ROOM WHICH WAS PACKED WITH PEOPLE.................KISSING, HOLDING HANDS, PLAYING WITH EACH OTHER'S HAND..............JOKING , LAUGHING...TALKING ABOUT SO MANY THINGS.........

I ALWAYS POINT OUT TO JIMMY THAT THE REST OF THE PEOPLE SEEM SO MISERABLE, AND YET WE ARE 2 VERY HAPPY PEOPLE, DESPITE OUR CIRCUMSTANCES............BUT THAT IS HOW WE ARE IN EACH OTHER'S PRESENCE.........HAPPY, IN LOVE, AND DEVOTED TO EACH OTHER..........

BEFORE HE WENT BACK TO HOPE HALL, WE HAD DINNER AT HOME......ROASTED CHICKEN,. BROCOLLI, SALAD, AND PIZZA...................I ALWAYS MAKE SURE I HAVE  A LARGE PITCHER OF ICED TEA WAITING FOR HIM EACH WEEK, AS HE LOVES THAT......

WELL, AS YOU CAN SEE, THESE PASSES HOME HAVE BEEN DEDICATED TO DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENTS...............JIMMY WANTS IT THAT WAY.HE IS A HUSBAND WHO IS VERY CONCERNED ABOUT ME, HIS WIFE.............

HE WILL COME HOME AGAIN NEXT WEEK, ON THURSDAY, AND THIS TIME WE HAVE AB APPOINTMENT FOR PRINCE, AT THE VET, TO GET HIS SHOTS, AND A GENERAL EXAM............WHOOPIE!...........I CAN'T WAIT!

THE WEEK AFTER NEXT, WE HAVE ANOTHER APPOINTMENT WITH THE MEDICAL DOCTOR.................

SO, THAT'S HOW IT IS GOING!............IT SIMPLY FEELS NORMAL TO HAVE JIMMY AT HOME WITH ME!

GOOD NITE!

FRAN

 

Friday, June 9, 2006

hello. once again

HI, ONCE AGAIN!

I'VE BEEN AWAY FOR SO LONG, BECAUSE MY COMPUTER PICKED UP A VIRUS....AND BROKE!

SO, I BOUGHT A NEW COMPUTER, AND HERE I AM AGain!

HOWEVER, MY EYES ARE VERY BLURRY, AND I HAVE TROUBLE SEEING THE SCREEN, AT THIS TIME, SO PLEASE FORGIVE THE MISTAKES!

JIMMY CAME HOME LAST SUNDAY, AND THEN AGAIN YESTERDAY, ON THURSDAY.....................IT WAS SO WONDERFUL!  HE CAME HOME FOR 2, 12 HOUR PASSES............HE ARRIVED HERE AT 8 AM, AND LEFT AT 8 PM....WE HAD A GREAT TIME, BOTH DAYS..HE TOOK A TAXI/CAR SERVICE HOME, AND BACK.

YESTERDAY HE TOOK ME TO THE MEDICAL DOCTOR, FOR A ROUTINE VISIT...........SO WE WERE BOTH VERY HAPPY FOR THAT...................HE WILL COME HOME AGAIN ON MONDAY, AND WILL TAKE ME TO THE EYE DOCTOR, AND WE ARE GRATEFUL FOR THAT.

WHEN JIMMY IS HOME, EVERYTHING SEEMS NORMAL AND NATURAL...THE HOUSE IS HAPPY, AND THE PETS ARE ALL AGLOW...................JIMMY IS A WONDERFUL MAN, AND NO MORE CAN REALLY BE SAID ABOUT HIM!

WE ARE MORE IN LOVE THAN EVER, AND I TINGLE AND SHINE EVERY MINUTE WE ARE TOGETHER.............

HE SIMPLY BELONGS HERE.IT IS HIS HOME.............AND WE ARE A PAIR THAT IS SIMPLY INSEPERABLE............EVEN BEING IN PRISON, HAS PROVED THAT FOR US.........

YESTERDAY, HE CAME HOME, AT 8 AM, AND THEN MADE BREAKFAST.EGGS, BACON, SAUSAGE..AND I MADE THE COFFEE............WE ATE , AND LAUGHED, AND HUGGED, AND KISSED, AND SAT RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER, AT THE KITCHEN TABLE, WITH THE 3 ANImALS ALL HAPPY AND AROUND US..............HE EVEN MADE A PLATE OF BACON FOR PRINCE, AND HE WAS IN HIS ELEMENT!

THEN WE LAID IN BED, AND JIMMY GAVE ME A TOTAL BODY MASSAGE, WHICH ACTUALLY PUT ME TO SLEEP..THEN, NEED I SAY THAT WE MADE LOVE OVER AND OVER AGAIN!...........JIMMY WAS ALSO INTERESTED IN LOOKING AT THINGS , MAINLY SERIALS, ON ON-DEMAND...........HE ALSO WAS WATCHING SUPERMAN 2, I BELIEVE.................BETWEEN WALKING PRINCE EVERY FEW HOURS, HE ALSO FIXED THINGS AROUND THE HOUSE..........HE FIXED THE FRONT SCREEN DOOR, AND PUT UP A NEW LIGHTBULB IN THE BATHROOM, AS I HAD BEEN IN THE DARK SINCE DECEMBER, WHEN HE WAS SO UNJUSTLY SENT BACK TO PRISON...........ON SUNDAY, JIMMY WASHED THE LIVING ROOM RUG, MOVING THE FURNITURE, ETC.  THEN ON THURSDAY, HE WORKED ON THE BEDROOM.HE WASHED THE RUG, AND TOOK OUT FROM UNDER THE BED, AT LEAST 50 EMPTY CANS OF CAT FOOD, THAT PRINCE HAD PUT THERE..ALSO AROUND 20 DOG BONES.IT WAS AMAZING!.........AND HE ALLOWED ME TO REST, THROUGH ALL THIS.

ON SUNDAY, I HAD COOKED A TASTY POT ROAST, AND JIMMY LATER COOKED RIGATONI WITH MEAT SAUCE.........ON THURSDAY, WE ORDERED CHINESE FOOD, HOME DELIVERY.AND I DO MEAN ORDER!..............like $50.00 WORTH OF CHINESE FOOD.WELL, THE LAST TIME WE HAD IT WAS IN DECEMBER...TWICE...................SO IN 3.2 YEARS OF IMPRISONMENT, WE HAD CHINESE FOOD ONLY 3 TIMES............NOT BAD I MUST SAY!.and in the past 3 months, only this onee ..............IT'S FUNNY HOW PRISON MAKES YOU COUNT THINGS, AND TIME........

FOR US, CHINESE FOOD IS A ROMANTIC EXPERIENCE!  WE LOVE SHARING THE FOOD, AND LATER LAYING IN BED TOGETHER!

YESTERDAY, WE ORDERED CHICKEN CHOW MEIN, EGG FOO YOUNG, EGG DROP SOUP WITH DUMPLINGS, A LARGE ORDER OF SPARE RIBS, BOILED DUMPLINGS, EGG ROLLS, HOT AND SOUR SOUP, AND CHICKEN LO MEIN.....................SO NEED I SAY MORE...............WE, WELL AT LEAST ME, ATE LIKE LITTLE PIGS!............................AND SO, THE DAY WAS A GREAT EXPERIENCE!

I MUST STOP AND TELL YOU HERE, THAT MY HUSBAND HAS LOST A GREAT DEAL OF WEIGHT IN PRISON...HE HAS GOTTEN SKINNY, I MUST SAY!.....................HE NOW WEIGHS 250 LBS...................THAT IS NOTHING COMPARED TO THE 400 LB. MAN I MARRIED 5 YEARS AGO................AND THE 350 LB. MAN THAT WENT TO PRISON 3 YEARS AGO................AND IN DECEMBER , WHEN HE LEFT KINTOCK, HE WAS 300 LBS...................AND NOW A MERE 250 LBS!.......................I LOVE HIM AT ALL, AND ANY SIZE....SO FOR ME IT DOESN'T MATTER, EXCEPT IT IS SIMPLY A QUESTION OF HEALTH

AND SO, I WILL SAY GOOD NITE, NOW.............

YES, LIFE RIGHT THIS MINUTE FEELS VERY NORMAL FOR ME, ONCE AGAIN................I AM A HAPPY PERSON, THE WAY I ALWAYS WAS.......NO LONGER SAD AND DEPRESSED..BUT MY HUSBAND'S WIFE..IN THE PLACE THAT I BELONG, AND FEEL HAPPY TO BE IN....................FRAN